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Louise Thomas
Editor
A soon-to-be-married couple made it abundantly clear which family members and friends they didn’t want with them on their big day.
The customary act of sending out invites before one’s wedding isn’t anything unusual. What’s uncommon is when a couple sends out “You’re Not Invited” cards to the people who aren’t lucky enough to get a place setting at their wedding – and that’s exactly what one couple decided to do.
In Reddit’s popular forum, Wedding Shaming, one cousin gave a detailed synopsis of two bizarre elements the bride and groom are planning for their nuptials.
“Cousin’s wedding is coming up soon and they are planning a small garden wedding. It’s a semi-destination wedding I would say. Five hours away from where everybody lives. They wanted it small with just family and friends due to budget,” the cousin started.
Because of the engaged pair’s desired wedding size, they were forced to make cuts from their guest list. Rather than leaving the uninvited bunch without a word, the bride and groom sent out cards.
“I just found out that the wedding couple are sending ‘cards’ to people that are not invited that they are getting married soon and ‘you are in our hearts on this special day’ BEFORE the wedding,” the Redditor confessed. Their excuse is for the sake of “curiosity and thinking of them.” In the cousin’s opinion, the couple shouldn’t send the cards out until after they say, “I do.” Of course, the bride and groom are set on the opposite.
What’s more, the Reddit writer admitted guests would be assigned tasks after the ceremony. Unless you’re in the bridal party, you’ll need to help set up for the reception. “Once the ceremony is done the wedding party will leave to take photos while the GUESTS set up the tables for the reception,” the cousin explained.
According to the Redditor, guests weren’t given a choice to help. When the frustrated cousin clarified with the bride and groom, they said: “Yes,” they were forcing guests who drove five hours for their wedding to help out.
“They even added that people are okay with it. Maybe certain people but not everybody,” the original poster noted. “Where is the respect, etiquette and morals. They said that financially they cant hire people to set up but they had almost two years to save and what did they do to save?” They didn’t. They traveled, according to their cousin.
The Reddit user said the bride and groom also assigned their parents errands to take care of on their big day. Additionally, the bride is planning to invite friends to her bridal shower who won’t be invited to her wedding.
“Wish me luck on this upcoming wedding,” the original writer finished.
Reddit readers weren’t afraid to comment on their unfiltered, harsh opinions about these wedding plans, arguing the whole fiasco didn’t seem worth attending.
One person wrote: “What they are planning sucks and is rude and that’s reason to not attend. If you do want to go to see family and to see a possible train wreck, make it clear that you aren’t going to help set anything up.”
Some people thought the purpose of sending the “You’re Not Invited” cards was to try and entice those individuals to send a gift. “It must be to try for more wedding gifts, don’t you think? I mean... who could think that saying, ‘we’re having a party but you can’t come’ is nice?” a reader questioned.
“The not invited cards are to get gifts, who are they kidding,” another agreed.
One Reddit user suggested: “Depending on if you would like to see the family and are otherwise healthy. Go and setup a few tables. Later when they ask about what happened to their gift, say you thought that was the gift.”
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