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Louise Thomas
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A frustrated wedding guest requested compensation after they bought a bunch of food for one event during the weekend.
The 28-year-old woman thought her request was reasonable until the bride accused her of being a “terrible friend.” Questioning whether she made the right decision, the woman took to Reddit’s popular confession forum, Am I The A**hole, to ask anonymous users if they thought she was wrong.
For context, the Redditor admitted she had a “well-paid” job, but she’s supporting herself and her boyfriend because he’d recently lost his job.
The wedding they were attending was a “two-day Spanish-Italian“ affair in which the Reddit user was asked to be the bride’s witness. “The two-day event was held three hours away from the city and included a wedding ceremony, lunch, party and next day a barbecue to celebrate the relative’s birthday,” she explained.
According to the Reddit user, guests were told not to bring gifts since the bride and groom were planning a second, larger wedding in Italy at a beautiful mansion.
“As a witness and best friend, I always went above and beyond by helping her in every day life,” the friend added. “For the wedding, I rented a car for +250 euro, I was picking up guests and helping a lot with logistics (bringing people from and to the airport).”
That said, when it came time for the barbeque, the Redditor was asked to help more than they intended. Upon arrival, she was notified about a food shortage and instructed to go to the grocery store.
The Reddit user said: “Fine, it happens, we made a list of groceries for ourselves. While we shopped, I got calls from the hosts to buy more food. My bf was even asked to get fresh bread.”
Then, when the Redditor returned to the barbeque, she was put on cooking duty. The food she purchased was being served to all the guests, but for some reason, her boyfriend wasn’t allowed to eat the bread he bought. Even though she was really the only guest helping, the Reddit user said she was happy to do so.
She noted: “Afterwards, the couple went on a honeymoon and asked me to take care of their plants for one month, which is totally fine with me. I prepared them a nice bottle of champagne to celebrate their return from the honeymoon.”
Wanting to be reimbursed for the food she bought not only for herself, but for all the guests, the original poster added her expenses to Splitwise, an app the calculates the total amount of money owed by each person in a group. The Redditor said she charged the bride for two-fifths of the total amount she paid.
“Despite my efforts and expenses, I was harshly criticized for being a terrible friend, for not bringing a present, not washing dishes, or contributing enough financially,” the woman confessed. “I was told that I should be thankful that their friends allowed us to stay overnight (we got them a bottle of expensive wine as a thank you).”
She continued: “Then her fiancé accused me of trying to get their money and suggested I check my finances. The groom even implied that I didn’t do enough for the wedding.”
The Redditor noted how “emotionally” disappointing this response was. She felt “unappreciated” and “hurt by the accusations and misunderstandings” from the bride and groom. Though her intentions were genuine, they didn’t see things that way. However, her fellow Reddit readers did.
Supportive Reddit users flocked to the comments section of her post, arguing she did nothing wrong in the situation. Most readers thought her reasons for requesting compensation were valid given the number of people she fed.
One person wrote: “You realized what kind of ‘friends’ they are, when they showed you their true colors, though. Be thankful for that. If they insist not paying you back, tell them to consider it your wedding present, then drop the acquaintance entirely.”
Another reader said: “They aren’t your friends. They treat you as a servant. I would let their plants die and drink the champagne myself.”
“You should send her this post link and the total of your groceries. Tell her if she doesn’t pay, it’s her wedding present,” one reader suggested.
A fourth added: “The reaction from your friend and the groom was disproportionate and hurtful, showing a lack of appreciation for your efforts.”
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