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Louise Thomas
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One former bride has a theory as to why so many friendships don’t survive the chaos of wedding planning.
In February, Jaina (@jainaazalea) took to TikTok, less than two weeks ahead of her big day, to explain her experience losing friends amid wedding stress.
“I recently confirmed the theory that you do in fact lose friends while you’re planning your wedding,” Jaina started. Though it may have been harsh to say, the content creator argued friendships shouldn’t be “mourned.”
When she pieced together and finalized details for her wedding, her unhealthy friendships became obvious. With little free time between attending to wedding issues and attempting to live her usual day-to-day, the friendships that once seemed to be healthy were no longer.
“I feel like it really puts into perspective which friendships are not well balanced,” Jaina noted. “Relationships ebb and flow. There are always going to be times where you’re maybe giving more, or the other person’s giving more, because everyone goes through their own thing in life.
“But I feel like you kind of really see it for what it is during wedding planning,” she continued.
The woman, who tied the knot with her forever partner on February 22, went on to talk about how wedding planning submerges you into a whole new stage in life – a time which some friends might not have experienced yet.
She noted: “Do you feel like there are sometimes when you’re progressing in a different stage of life, and someone isn’t?”
“I could definitely see how that might throw off the balance of a friendship,” Jaina remarked.
Relationships are often built upon loyalty and trust, but oftentimes people have different expectations. For Jaina, wedding planning left her feeling very lonely, with not many people to “lean on” for support. The friend she thought she might’ve been able to count on wasn’t there for her when she needed them.
She confessed: “The friend that I lost was a long-term friend.” That said, Jaina has always believed in the divine concept of “everything happens for a reason.” What will be, will be, and it was most likely meant to end in the way it did.
“Why am I going to sit here and be sad for something that was going to be inevitable?” she questioned. “If things are naturally ending, and even if they’re during times of great happiness and big things in your life like weddings where you’re supposed to be celebrating and it’s supposed to be the best time ever, don’t let that cloud that joy. Just keep moving forward.”
Many commenters agreed with Jaina’s theory, adding their own input and experience.
One TikTok user wrote: “People get jealous, or they are not genuine for those happy moments in your life. We must be carefree towards friends sometimes.”
“100% one month as a fiancé and haven’t seen my friends in so long,” an experienced woman admitted. One bride said: “What a nice way to put it! I’m going through this right now and my wedding is in 3 months.”
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