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Louise Thomas
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A groom has sparked outrage after he refused to change the color scheme for his wedding.
In a recent post shared to the popular “Am I The A**hole?” Reddit forum, the groom shared how he and his partner of five years have started discussing wedding planning, after being engaged for about nine months. He acknowledged that his fiancée is doing “a great job” planning it out, confessing that he’s “just letting her choose what she wants,” as it’s her big day.
He then explained that they’ve been talking about color schemes for his “suit accessories and the bridesmaids’ dresses,” as he pointed out that his favorite color is Cadbury purple. Although he claimed that the bride-to-be initially agreed on that color scheme, she later changed her mind.
“It then got to the point where she was suggesting different types of colors we could have, ‘lilac, peach, sage green, baby blue,’” he explained. “I said ‘I already told you I want Cadbury purple.’ She said that I can’t have Cadbury purple because it doesn’t go with anything.”
According to the groom, he told his partner that he was fine with her being in charge of everything about the wedding, and “the only input [he] wanted to add” was regarding what he’d be wearing at the event. However, they still had an argument regarding the color scheme, during which the groom stood his ground about wanting Cadbury purple.
“She started to get into a strop, saying that I’m making it difficult and asking if we can just compromise, and I said that it wouldn’t be compromising if it’s not the color I want,” he continued. “I said if I don’t have Cadbury purple then I don’t care what color I have. And she should just pick it herself and not pretend that I have a say in the wedding when I clearly don’t.”
The Reddit post has quickly gone viral, with more than 2,000 upvotes. In the comments, multiple people have criticized the groom for saying that he wants his partner to take the reins in wedding planning. They also slammed him for not compromising with the bride-to-be about the color scheme, with claims that Cadbury purple wasn’t a good fit for a wedding.
“You’ve dumped the burden of planning everything on her, then given her the challenge of trying to incorporate Cadbury purple into a decent color scheme. She’s offered several compromises of non-traditional colors, so it’s not that she wants to stick you in traditional black,” one wrote. “You’ve only contributed to one decision, and it’s now dictating the rest of the wedding that you aren’t even planning.”
“Buddy, you don’t get a say if you don’t help with the planning, plain and simple,” another wrote. “You get to come in and make an executive decision and then she needs to source suits, decorations, and other wedding items in your specific Cadbury purple? If you were an active participant in the wedding planning process that would be different, but you’re sitting back and letting her do all the work so you can just show up the day of and enjoy yourself.”
AITA for not budging on my wedding colour scheme.
byu/Haunting-Raisin988 inAmItheAsshole
“Why can’t you wear the purple you want and have the wedding party wear lilac, or whatever shade you agree upon? Seems like an easy compromise, and then everyone won’t be matchy-matchy. More stylish that way, too,” a third responded.
In an edit to his post, the groom clarified that the outfit he wanted for the wedding was just “plain black trousers, white shirt, purple tie, and a white blazer.” He then gave more details about why his fiancée wasn’t fond of the idea.
“[She] isn’t keen on the color because it doesn’t go with the aesthetics of our venue, it’s a beautiful modern rustic barn with fairy lights and a bright atmosphere, she believes that the color I chose will contrast too much in what she envisioned,” he wrote.
He also clarified that he and his partner are in the “very very early stages” of wedding planning since they haven’t even set a date yet. The groom then hit back at criticism he faced about his lack of involvement in the wedding planning.
“All the work which has been done so far is budget, a few venue viewings, guest list (which I did have an input in), and starting to pick a color scheme,” he added. “The work hasn’t begun yet. I’ve told her if she wants my input on anything I’ll help but I don’t want to get in her way of having the wedding she wants.”
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