Parenting is a demanding and rewarding role that requires immense energy, patience and love. The constant juggling of responsibilities can be overwhelming, so it's not surprising that new research has found that parental burnout is on the rise.
A recent review published in BMC Public Health found that moms in particular were more likely to experience burnout with pressures such as the need to be perfect, a high need for control and how much time is spent with their children all impacting how they show up as parents.
"Being a parent is a demanding role, and it's crucial for parents, especially moms, to take time for themselves to recharge and maintain their well-being," said Heidi Skudder, parenting expert at Stokke and founder of Positively Parenthood.
Newsweek spoke to five moms who share the little things that help them remain energized and ring-fence some time on their own.
As a self-proclaimed expert in parental burnout, Rachel Cederbaum told Newsweek that running a small business and raising three young children is like a circus. To combat parental exhaustion, Cederbaum is a big advocate for self-care as an investment to show up for her children and husband more effectively.
"Juggling it all often leads to balls being dropped ([like] missing my son's soccer game because I lost track of the 16 WhatsApp groups I track daily). I nap almost daily, and I exercise at Barre3 Bethesda at least five times a week.
"I am always exhausted, and in order to be the best parent, human, friend, and wife, something needs to give. So, if the little thing moms do looks like taking a bubble bath, reading quietly, taking an actual vacation away from their kids, or going on a walk in their neighborhood with their favorite podcast, I am your hype girl," she told Newsweek.
Sometimes, the best way to recharge is to escape reality for a couple of hours. Watching a film in her local movie theater has become a monthly ritual for 33-year-old mom Victoria Moy.
"I was a little nervous to go in alone the first time, but I absolutely loved the experience of going to the cinema on my own, and emerged feeling completely relaxed and refreshed," the mom of two told Newsweek.
"The great thing is, you can't have your phone on, so it offers you a couple of hours completely undisturbed. I recommend it to any parent needing a break."
Dedicating time to activities that rejuvenate you is a surefire way to top up your cup, Skudder said.
"Self-care isn't selfish, it's necessary. This could include taking a bath, reading a book, exercising, or simply enjoying a quiet cup of tea. Prioritize these moments to help keep the balance on your parenting journey."
One mom who suffers from burnout on a daily basis is Aghogho Oluese. As a mom of two toddlers and online food blogger, the power of a takeout and episode of reality TV is the tonic to help her ease the load.
"I have to be mom, wife, and moneymaker, all while keeping the house clean, food on the table and running a million errands. Whenever I have a really stressful day and I'm overwhelmed, I tend to order takeout after the kids are in bed.
"I give everything to everyone all day, so when I order myself some good food, I get to be a little selfish for a few hours. Paired with an episode of a reality TV show, and you've got the perfect formula to help ease my stress," she told Newsweek.
Motherhood can also take over your identity and it's common for parents to lose who they were before having children.
Bestselling author of Stop Apologising Tara Rule, 43, told Newsweek that she recharges by being with other people.
"My husband and I both see the value of having time by ourselves, time together as a couple and time as a family, so we encourage each other to go out or go on holidays with our friends and we have regular date nights so that we're both filling up our cups."
"Coffee after school drop off with some of the school moms is one of my favorite things to do each week," Rule revealed.
"It's very impromptu; one person will just write the word 'coffee?' at 7 a.m., and by 8.30, there are usually 3 or 4 of us together laughing and sharing our tales from that morning."
Connecting with friends is "vital for emotional well-being," Skudder told Newsweek.
"Sharing your experiences and feelings with someone who understands can be incredibly uplifting and be helpful as a mother to know that others are feeling exactly as you are too," she said.
Ayo Haynes, a single mom to a grade-school child and full-time work-from-home professional, has developed a strategy called "integrated enrichment," which helps her avoid burnout as someone who spends a lot of time with her child due to home schooling.
As part of her program, Haynes regularly plays competitive tennis which provides physical exercise, social interaction, and a mental break. She began playing tennis when she was 12 and was recruited to be a ball girl at the U.S. Open when she was a teenager.
Competing in New York came with a hefty price tag, stopping her from playing altogether but she picked up the racket again after moving to Connecticut five years ago.
"[I found] a tribe of friends and players at a much more affordable price. I practice with a coach in a group setting twice a month, occasionally drop in to a Friday night adult tennis party, and USTA league play on women's and mixed double teams," Haynes told Newsweek.
Her integrated approach is one she now shares with her coaching clients who struggle with work-life balance and parental burnout.
"It allows me to maintain my personal identity, professional growth, and parental responsibilities without feeling overwhelmed," Haynes added.
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